Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
Randomize
