he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Randomize
