you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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