How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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