If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Randomize
