Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
I slept walked to the toilet and woke up pooping. Easily one of the most disorienting events of my life.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Randomize
