he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
Randomize
