YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
does your mom think i'm crazy? i just realized i played both the gay dad and the ex-jew card tonight. i blame the wine
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
Did you just see the Batmobile???
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
Randomize