Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
he is a god among men.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Randomize
