Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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