Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
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