Well douche your snatch and let's go!
Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
I made him laugh his dick is mine
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
Randomize
