He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
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