My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
he puts the penis in happiness.
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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