if i get killed by an online date, its your job to tell my parents that we met at church
How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
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