i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
They are going to name an STD after you.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
Randomize
