Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(310): View more from California

Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.

(310): View more from California

Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.

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(504): View more from Louisiana

Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?

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(609): View more from New Jersey

im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room

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(425): View more from Washington

I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.

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(832): View more from Houston, Texas

At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??

(713): View more from Texas

Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.

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(480): View more from Arizona

West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH

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(315): View more from New York

I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.

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(262): View more from Wisconsin

got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.

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(503): View more from Oregon

Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good

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