The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Randomize
