I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
Randomize
