if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
Drunk is not a location!
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
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