Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
Never underestimate the power of titties
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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