i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
I woke up with my face in a pile of pancakes and 3000 mistakes.
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Randomize
