oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
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