we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
Randomize
