Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
You might have been able to redeem yourself had you not referred to grandma as "this bitch".
That explains the hand print on my face. That old lady knows how to throw a punch.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
