we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
I will pee on everything he values.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
Randomize
