I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Randomize
