Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
Randomize
