You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
