Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize
