This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
