my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
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