Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
