my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
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