OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
Randomize