that's an acceptable place to lick
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Randomize
