Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
