Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
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