Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
