i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Randomize
