First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
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