I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
Had dinner with a married woman but didn't have sex with her. Tweeted at Mike Pence to apologize anyway.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
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