Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
Randomize
