..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
i think we sleep fucked last night...
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