A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
My pussy is not your playground.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
Randomize
