why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
she smelled like a LAN party
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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