I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
