It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
So I stole cocaine from one of my Tinder hookups
And that is the most millennial sentence I've ever said
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
