so let's talk penis.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Randomize
