if you like me you must not know who I am
doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Randomize
